So, I’m pretty excited about today’s post. I can’t take any of the credit for it – that all goes to my friend, Tyler. The “first look” planning and day-of attire is almost always planned by the bride; rarely is the groom involved. So, I love Tyler’s take on the first look, and I’m hoping to see some of you grooms play a bigger role in what you wear.
This is my first post as a guest writer on Landlocked Bride. In my particular case, I would be a Landlocked Groom, though, I am far away from planning my big day. I have, however, provided wedding fashion consulting primarily for grooms in concert with their leading ladies for nearly 5 years now. I stumbled upon this very rewarding opportunity as a retail sales associate at various men’s luxury clothing stores that served as destination spots for formal wear, and have worked with parties boasting 2 to 12 groomsmen.
Some men walk confidently into the store with a firm idea of what they would like to wear on their wedding day. Others do not and bring their fiancés to help provide direction. The former men ultimately do seek permission from their brides-to-be in their final purchase. One thing is uniform – the decision for men’s clothing comes down to that of the bride. Pardon me if I may respectfully ask, but when did brides’ become experts on men’s tailored clothing?
You, brides, know that you wouldn’t for a second bring your man along when trying on dresses nor would you solicit his input on your final decision. Tradition would have it that you will surprise him the day of your wedding. You may have even dreamt of your ideal wedding well before you met the love of your life. And now with the accessibility of mood boarding sites like Pinterest and Polyvore, you have become your own wedding consultant. Kudos to you. Many men take a back seat to planning (whether by choice or design) and it is up to you and your parents. You do have a hard task ahead of you – one that may take months if not a year to plan. Remember though, at the end of the day, he will be wearing the clothes during the wedding, photos and the reception. So if there is one area where you might take a little pressure off of yourselves, try delegating the men’s clothing decisions to him.
Now, I, your writer, am not naïve to the risky decision you have made entrusting him to look the part while ultimately contributing to the fate of your wedding day photos. What lasts more than the ceremony? … The Photos! Many men might feel significant performance anxiety at the challenge; others may welcome it. But here is an opportunity to have fun with your wedding and to create a very exciting first look – for the both of you.
To reiterate, I am aware you have set out to take part in a perfect wedding and throwing caution to the wind is not the first idea that comes to mind. So the biggest step is letting go. Your question to me is likely: How will I know that he and his groomsmen will not ruin my dream wedding? Good question. You don’t. This is where a friend/family member with whom you confide or a certified wedding planner comes into the picture. This individual will serve as a neutral party with your strictest confidences. They will have the implicit task of making sure your clothing decisions do not clash but rather compliment much like an assortment of flowers in a bouquet. I like to call this Wedding Wardrobe Insurance. All the meanwhile, they will maintain the secret wardrobe despite your prying – my eye is on you, brides!
Can you imagine your first look now? Is it more powerful? Seeing him for him and being surprised by his sartorial splendor…