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So, you’re busy planning away. You have come up with a good idea. One that is “outside the box.” One that will wow your guests. One that makes your wedding unique.

But, then someone crushes your dreams with one little comment: “You can’t do that.”

To all of the naysayers, the bridesmaids, the groomsmen, the moms and dads, the grandparents who tell you brides and grooms that your idea is “breaking wedding tradition,” tell them this:

There are no rules. Traditions are what are important to you. Not what everyone else is doing.

This means:

Brides can wear a colored veil (or no veil at all for that matter).

Image courtesy of Trent Bailey Photography via Wedding Chicks

Dogs can tag along at the ceremony.

Image courtesy of Gomez Photography via Wedding Chicks

Groomsmen don’t have to wear a tux.

Images courtesy of Dreamtime Images via Style Me Pretty

Your cake icing can be colored and not white. You can see the groom (or bride) before the ceremony. You don’t have to have the same number of bridesmaids and groomsmen. Your bridesmaids can each wear a different dress. Hell, you don’t even have to have a wedding party.

Just remember: Make your wedding what you want to. After all, it is your wedding. I understand your parents may be helping to pay, but at the end of the day it’s your wedding, not theirs. Add the details that are personal. Stop worrying what everyone else will think. Forget about what is “in” and “hot.”  Make it what you (and your significant other) want.  And most importantly, you don’t have to follow the rules.

10 Comments

  1. AMEN! THANK YOU FOR THIS. The wedding world so needs to hear it! Now I’m dying to know… what are you planning that people were naysaying!? Tell us tell us!

  2. Indeedio. The rules are meant to be broken or embraced. It is whatever feels good for you.

  3. I CANNOT stop looking at that veil!! YES to YELLOW! 100% agreed on wedding “rules” – they should definitely be your own.

  4. I’ve never seen a colored veil! I love it!

  5. Must say that EVERY DAY – it’s whatever you choose to honor or create as your own tradition…

  6. Amen sister! (yes Amanda up top said it first but it was worth repeating). It’s funny though: when I’m struggling with breaking tradition the mothers reassure me that anything goes these days (probably to shut me up). But when I blatantly tell them I’m doing something “different” I get “are you sure?” “We don’t do that.” Arg.
    Yes please do elaborate. Are you breaking the mold?

  7. Jamie
    8:56 pm on May 6th, 2010

    Well you already know how I feel about this. 🙂

  8. Thanks for posting this! Totally agree with you. A wedding should be about your style as a couple. You shouldn’t have to please all your families and friends needs; a wedding is about celebrating yourself as a married couple.

    And oh gosh I love the yellow veil! I have never considered a colored veil before, but now its going to be all I can think about!

    Thanks for sharing this,

    Netanya
    netanya@engagementring.org

  9. I couldn’t agree more Brit!! Wedding traditions are what you make them, not what “they have always been.” No one should ever feel obligated to do something just because that’s what their mom’s did, etc. Weddings today are becoming even less traditional which I absolutely love! Great post!

  10. Mrs T
    2:06 am on May 10th, 2010

    That yellow veil is TO DIE FOR